Here's how I'd like to receive news about the retail industry from this point on. "Everything is down until you hear from us otherwise."

Enough said. Let's talk about what's "up" in the retail world.

Retail car sales were up 21.2% in Newfoundland in October. It could have something to do with the fact that the Canadian province is the same size as the state of California, but has 30% less population than the city of San Francisco. That's a lot of land to cover in between people. It would be lonely without a car.

Auto sales were also up in Singapore, along with the retail sales of furniture, computers, medical goods, and toiletries, for an overall 8.4% increase. Since Singapore is both a city and a country, we should probably divide all percentages by two, to be fair.

U.S. sentiment is up. The Reuters/University of Michigan Survey of Consumers index revealed a .3 change to the positive, compared to October's figures. That could be equal to about 23 people who are feeling more optimistic, but we'll take it as a good sign.

The retail sale of guns is up. (No official figures have been released from the street trafficking industry.) Let's hope that not too many more economic factors go down, otherwise we might be reading about some unsavory firearms-related things going up in the next few months.

Some grocery store are seeing their revenues go up due in part to the strong increase in Spam sales. The Hormel plant in Austin, Minnesota is running two shifts, seven days a week, to keep up with the demand. When the economy gets tough, the tough eat processed pork parts in a can.

Apparently the tough also eat McDonald's, because their global sales were also up 8.2%. Makers of cholesterol medication and insulin are preparing for what is going up next.

There's no big moral to this retail story. Sometimes it's just nice to look "up" and get a different perspective.

This week Google officially unveiled its latest strategy for turning a profit with its video mega monolith, YouTube. It’s a strategy that’s not only potentially explosive for the revenue-starved YouTube, it could be equally as explosive for revenue-starved retailers.

Now if you want your video to be seen by more people, YouTube will help you – for a price, of course. Just like you can pay to get your website to appear to Google searchers, you will now also be able to pay to get your videos to appear to YouTube searchers.

It’s mind-boggling to think what this might be able to do for retailers who have some kind of video to help them sell their stuff. While you can swing a herd of cats and not hit a shopper in the malls these days, more than 90 million people are wandering around YouTube every month. Matching retailers who have lots of stuff but no traffic with a website that has lots of traffic but nothing to sell seems so logical that you have to wonder why it took the highly inventive Googlers two years to come up with it. It’s the simple and obvious answers that elude us sometimes.

Consider the latest statistics. Ninety-two million people watch an average of 54.8 videos for a total of five billion video views, give or take a few hundred thousand. 75% of all Americans view at least one online video each month, and the average viewer spends almost six hours per month watching videos.

I have been involved in more than one discussion among baby boomers wondering who amongst us has 6 hours to spend trolling through home made video productions looking for… What exactly are these videophiles looking for? According to web analytics site Compete DataHub, YouTubers are looking for entertainment, laughs, diversion, and sex, not necessarily in that order.

This is good for retailers to know. If you want to try this new Google service to advertise your products via video, it might serve you best to have a video that is entertaining, funny, or sexy because that’s what YouTube viewers are conditioned to expect.

Will YouTube viewers buy your product if they like your video? If not, then there’s a whole bunch of people who have been wasting a whole bunch of time and money on SuperBowl advertising for a whole lot of years.

For retailers who have been meaning to get around to thinking about the possibility of maybe making a video some day, consider hiring a 19 year-old to do it rather than a big-time Madison Avenue advertising agency. If the Numa Numa guy, "Daft Hands," Paris Hilton XXX tape, and the Diet Coke-Mentos experiment have taught us anything, it’s that entertainment value and “keeping it real” trumps slick production in the wide world of online videos.

Whether you love Google, or fear its power and dominance, the retail world can’t help but root for the success in its pay-per-click video advertising scheme. A win for Google would signify that its sponsored search video advertisers are winning too. Right about now a win for the people who sell things would be a nice change of pace.

Whether you supported his election or not, whether you like his politics or not, there’s no denying that Barack Obama has leadership qualities that get results. A record number of voters in certain demographics were motivated to participate in this election like they had never done before. Obama, the individual candidate, doesn’t get all the credit for that. But, it’s a fact that he was at the head of the line in this year’s national game of follow-the-leader, and millions of people enthusiastically lined up behind him.

The Obama campaign was not just a political victory, it was also a case study in leadership. If managers can strip away the politics, they’ll find strategies they can use to motivate their retail employees just as effectively as Obama rallied his supporters.

Employees Want a Mission

Different groups of people assigned all sorts of meaning to this election. The validity of all those meanings was not the important matter from a managerial perspective. What deserved managerial attention was the behavior of people who believed they were part of something bigger than themselves.

The “change” mission tapped into a seemingly inexhaustible supply of commitment, energy, persistence, and creativity. An equally compelling mission in the workplace would access the same high level of engagement. Here’s a hint, though. “Do what I say or get fired,” is not as compelling as it might seem to be.

Employees Want Clarity

The goal was clear – win the election. How supporters could participate in creating the win was equally as clear. Register. Get others registered. Influence the undecideds. Get to the polls. Get others to the polls. Voters were glad to take their marching orders from a leader they believed in and respected.

A mission without clarity is a wall poster. Clarity without a mission is an employee handbook. A mission coupled with clarity is victory.

Employees Want to Celebrate

Voters took to the streets in New Year’s Eve fashion on election day because somebody gave them both the reason and the permission to celebrate. Employees are looking for that reason and permission as well, and they want a genuine opportunity to celebrate more than once every four years. Leaders who proactively create a culture of celebration will find that their employees will perform in ways that are celebration worthy.

Certainly president-elect Obama has not yet proven himself to be a legendary leader. He has (at least) four years to do that. So far, what Obama has given the leaders and managers of the world is a contemporary benchmark for inspirational leadership. When you think about it, that's a pretty valuable gift.

Obama swept the Electoral College, and election day promotions swept through the retail industry yesterday. Which retailers won the popular vote for their promotions? Here are some of the outstanding nominees.

Most Unlikely and Unrelated Election Day Promo: Free tattoo eradication session at New Look Laser Tattoo Removal, Dallas Texas

Which was higher? The number of old boyfriend and girlfriend names that were removed from skin yesterday or the number of Republicans who were removed from the House and Senate? The race was too close to call.

Best Patriotic Promo: Free red, white and blue dessert at Park 52 Restaurant, Chicago, IL

Red velvet cake with white cream cheese frosting and fresh blueberries doesn’t really sound appetizing, but not everything related to politics is easy to stomach.

Most Melodic Election Day Promo: Half price tickets to “Guys and Dolls” at Portland Center Stage, Portland, OR

Life, liberty, and the pursuit of musical theater – I get the connection.

Best Tasting Election Day Promo: Free slice of cheesecake at Eli’s Cheesecake, Chicago, IL

If you’ve ever eaten Eli’s cheesecake, then you know.

Most Erotic Election Day Promo: Free adult toys at Babeland, New York, Los Angeles, Seattle

Different people deal with the thrill of victory and the agony of defeat in different ways. Viva la difference!

Most Healthy Election Day Promo: Free flu shots at 280 polling sites in 42 states

There's nothing like getting jabbed with a needle to punctuate an historic moment!

Consumers were treated to free Starbucks coffee, free Chick-fil-A sandwiches, free Krispy Kreme donuts, free Ben and Jerry’s ice cream, half-price haircuts, discount clothing, free yogurt, free pizza, free ribs, free beer, free cupcakes, free car washes and free bus rides. The day was festive. The energy was high. For a brief moment in time, the entire nation seemed to feel the empowerment that comes just from participating.

There were many takeaways with these giveaways for retailers. It was easy to see that people are looking for a reason to be happy and looking for an excuse to celebrate. So, if consumers already have the idea in their head that Christmas is going to be a bust, then retailers would do well to give people a different reason to be merry and a different excuse to celebrate.

November is National Peanut Butter Month, and November 14th is the official birthday of the teddy bear. December 10th is Nobel Peace Prize Day, and December 15th is National Firefighters Day. There are plenty of offbeat promotion possibilities to be found in the minor holidays that are usually ignored. Be different, capture headlines, get noticed, and make sales. It's a winning formula that worked well for one president-elect we all know.